Fuck Normal.

When I was 22, on a diagnostic technicality some psychiatrists labelled me officially bi-polar.

The reason being, around that time, I had a full blown psychotic episode that lasted over a month that was not drug induced. According to the DSM (Diagnostic Statistics Manual of Mental disorders) I technically I had to have either schizophrenia or bipolar for this to happen.

So, bipolar it was.

Thankfully I politely told that doctor to shove his label up his ass and after an extremely epic year escaped the mental health system (relatively) unharmed.

That period in my life was full on, it was an opening and a connection to a spiritual, creative, embodied understanding I had never come into contact with, it was a deep processing of some really dark dirty unconscious shit, it was the byproduct of pumping way too much energy through a tiny little body that had no idea how to hold it all.

I honour that experience for everything it gifted me and one of biggest things that got cemented in that time and I am still extremely passionate about is the danger of labelling our emotional nature as an 'illness' or something to 'fix' rather than just being with it and learning from it.

Yes under some kind of 'bible of normal' I was a fucking lunatic and actually still am.

​The difference now though is I can generally fully accept and listen to my depth and recognise the cycles of nature within - of light and dark, happy and sad, horrifying and glorious and honour the gifts that I have to go to the depths of feeling all of it. As i grow and mature my ability to be with and manage the fluctuations of myself becomes so much gentler. But I don't think I will ever be considered 'normal' and I actually think the whole concept is a really dangerous one that disconnects us very early on to the depth of who we really are creativity, spiritually, emotionally and psychically.

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